There are things that the Bible does not explicitly label as black or white, right or wrong, wise or foolish. These are grey areas in which two devout Christians can completely disagree with each other while both honor the Lord. Think musical worship style, church dress code, traditions, alcohol, politics, tattoos, how to educate children, etc.
It can be difficult to love those who disagree with you in the grey areas, and this difficulty can lead to division in the church. Those who love traditional hymns can find it difficult to accept those who prefer rock concert worship. Those in jeans can be tempted to look down on those in suits as behind-the-times. Those who cherish their long-held religious traditions can tend to judge those who disregard those traditions in favor of new ideas. This is what was happening in the Roman church, and it can happen in our church if we’re not careful.
The Problem in the Roman Church
Romans 14:1-5a lays out their grey area challenge:
1) As for the one who is weak in faith, welcome him, but not to quarrel over opinions. 2) One person believes he may eat anything, while the weak person eats only vegetables. 3) Let not the one who eats despise the one who abstains, and let not the one who abstains pass judgment on the one who eats, for God has welcomed him. 4) Who are you to pass judgment on the servant of another? It is before his own master that he stands or falls. And he will be upheld, for the Lord is able to make him stand. 5) One person esteems one day as better than another, while another esteems all days alike…
There were some who were weaker in faith than others and this discrepancy was fueling division in the church. The strong were not welcoming the weak and both parties were despising and judging each other. The occasion for the division was a grey area related to diet and holy days. It seems that some of the Christians felt obliged to maintain the old covenant dietary laws and holy days, while others felt free in Christ not to.
Before examining the passage for principles that will help us avoid grey area division, we need to address the subject of faith weakness.
Faith Weakness
Why does the Bible call those who hold to a stricter religious standard regarding diet and holy days weak? After all, they observed these restrictions “in honor of the Lord” (v.6). They were strong in discipline, devotion, opinion and Christian character—yet they were weak in faith.
This means that the true test of your faith’s strength is not discipline, devotion, opinion or religious practice. It’s freedom. In Christ we are justified, forgiven, cleansed and adopted as sons and daughters. It’s done! Therefore we are freed from both sin and religion. As Paul wrote in Galatians 5:1, “For freedom Christ has set us free…”
So we are all at different points on the faith-strength continuum. Those on the weak side feel constrained in the grey areas. Those on the strong side feel free in the grey areas. And relationships between the two can be difficult. Here are three rules from Romans 14:1-12 that will help.
Three Rules for Relating in the Grey Areas
1. Move Toward Each Other
Paul opens this chapter with this command: “As for the one who is weak in faith, welcome him, but not to quarrel over opinions.”
The word translated welcome in the original language means “to lay hold of with initiative,” “to aggressively receive with strong personal interest.” This is more than being cordial when forced to socialize. This is intense pursuit of relationship.
Why pursue those who disagree with you? “[F]or God has welcomed him” (v.3b). As you move away from that frustrating person with whom you disagree, God brushes past you to lay hold of them with initiative, to aggressively receive them with strong personal interest.
2. Watch Your Heart
Paul goes on to say, “Let not the one who eats despise the one who abstains, and let not the one who abstains pass judgment on the one who eats, for God has welcomed him. Who are you to pass judgment on the servant of another? It is before his own master that he stands or falls. And he will be upheld, for the Lord is able to make him stand.” Those enjoying their freedom in Christ are tempted to despise (look down upon as lower) those who are constrained by weak faith. Those constrained by weak faith are tempted to judge those who are free.
Take alcohol for example. There are Christians who believe that they are free to drink so long as they don’t get drunk. They believe that it is honoring to the Lord to enjoy this freedom. There are others who believe that it is wrong to drink. They believe it is honoring to the Lord to abstain from anything that could lead to sin or harm their witness in the world. Both sides arrived at their convictions in effort to honor the Lord, and therefore they have a hard time understanding how the other side could possibly disagree unless there’s something wrong with them. So the free-to-drink people look down on the not-free-to-drink people. And the not-free-to-drink people judge the free-to-drink people.
To avoid disunity in the church, we must not despise and judge each other. Why? Because it’s not our place. “Who are you to pass judgment on the servant of another?” (See also verses 7-12.) In other words, we have no right or authority to conduct performance reviews on each other in the grey areas. If our brother is sinning, then we must lovingly approach him. But in the grey areas, we need to mind our own business. Which brings us to the third and final point.
3. Think Deeply and Carefully
Verse 5b says, “Each one should be fully convinced in his own mind.” You would have expected Paul to say something like, “Just lighten up on these secondary issues and get along.” But he says the opposite. He says to reach firm conviction in your own mind regarding these things. This means that the way to maintain unity in the grey areas is not to sweep them under the rug, but to think deeply and clearly.
What are your convictions about politics or tattoos or education or any other important grey area? How did you come to them? What does the Bible really say? Have you studied? Have you researched? Have you thought deeply and clearly?
It will become clearer why this step is so important in the coming weeks when we study verses 13-23. But for now, move toward each other, watch your heart and be fully convinced in your own mind in the grey areas.
Discussion Starters
- Brainstorm a list of areas in which Christians commonly disagree.
- Why are those who religiously abstain from certain foods and observe certain religious days “weak in faith?” (Mine the rest of chapter 14 for clues. Also: Mark 7:14-23 and Colossians 2:16-23)
- What are some practical ways we can “welcome” weaker brothers and sisters?
- Comb the passage for theological truths.
- Comb the passage for commands.
- How to these theological truths undergird the commands?
- How does this passage apply to specific examples in which Christians disagree?
- Take some time to pray together, specifically confessing areas in which you despise or judge others and asking for help in welcoming brothers and sisters who differ in opinion and in being fully convinced in your own mind.
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