This series of blog posts are modified from an article I wrote for the Witness about Biblical Fatherhood. You need to read the introductory post before reading this one.
What initiated Jesus’ incarnation? The Father sent him (John 3:17; 8:42). How did Jesus always know what to do in any given situation? He did what he saw the Father doing and what the Father told him to do (John 5:19, 36; 14:31). Where did Jesus get the powerful lessons he taught? They were not his own, but what the Father told him to say (John 7:16; 8:26, 28). A godly father gives thorough, clear, meaningful direction to his children.
“Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth” (Psalm 127:4). What good is an arrow without a target? Directionless dads are careless archers and the world is riddled with the consequent damage. Kids need direction for their energy, time, and talent or they fly like wayward arrows, writing on the walls as toddlers and drunk driving as adolescents.
God has convicted me as I’ve worked on this article that I often give my children weak direction, failing to make plain what I want them to do or stop doing before they end up in time-out, frustrated. As Ephesians 6:1-4 makes clear, children are to obey their parents and fathers are to be careful not to provoke them to anger as they discipline and instruct. This is hard and tricky work that takes intentionality; but I’ve seen how a child’s frustration can grow into anger and resentment as they enter their teen and adult years.
Are our kids clear about our desires for their behavior? Are they clear about what we want them to do, from finishing their green beans to furthering their education? Do they know how much we desire that they consider the gospel and respond to it? Do they understand that we want them to be passionate about God, concerned for people, and engaged in making disciples? Or more foundationally, are we as fathers clear in our own minds about what direction our kids should take?
